Wednesday, November 4, 2009

fuck me with a purpose


My friend calls me to tell me about her new boyfriend, how he has a small penis and it hits her in all the right spots, her last boyfriend had a huge penis and she hated it, now she has orgasms which she didn't before. Then she talks about work, the movie business, boring and theater stuff, extra boring. I'm glazing over, these are not the areas that make us such good friends, but we are so i endure. Then she says, "I will preface this with I really like your girlfriend.." and I say, "But?"
"In all the time I've known you all your relationships have been with very strong, sometimes bitchy, usually very crazy women. More often than not curvy large breasted women, all women I'm sure could kick my ass. All in all very passionate relationships. Your girlfriend is very thin,pretty but almost waif like, very nice, funny and grounded. For such a passionate, romantic, freaky kinky guy, she seems a little sedate. I wonder if this is a result of your divorce, I wonder if you traded in passion for control."
I tell her that I have thought about this already and yes I have traded passion for control. I no longer want crazy passion,I don't want someone to be the center of my universe, I left that with my x-wife. She tells me that this is horrible and sad. This goes back and forth a little more, we say good night.
I like what I have with my girlfriend, it's probably the most "normal" relationship I've ever had and "normal" to me is like porn. Yes I get a little bored sometimes, but the trade off seems worth it. It's nice to keep my own crazy in check. I'm addicted to the crazy, the bloody passion, the chemistry thing, like a junkie for the chemistry thing. I used to be a pro at turning my life upside down, I don't want that any more.
We don't have a crazy passionate relationship, but we laugh a lot, were nice to each other, we have a good sex life, sometimes a little kinky, and she feels loved. That's enough for me.
I've purged, I feel better, thanks for listening.

1 comment:

xTx said...

i like listening. to this. glad you seem like you got a good one.